True Empathy Can Win the Day

A farmer had a litter of puppies for sale. As he was driving the last nail into his advertising yard sign, he felt a tug at his overalls. "Mister," said a boy at his feet, "I want to buy a puppy."

"Well," said the farmer, "These puppies come from fine parents and cost lots of money. How much do you have?"

The boy dropped his head momentarily, then drew several coins from his pocket. "I don't have much, but is this enough to take a look?"

The farmer paused reluctantly but before he could answer three puppies rolled out of the doghouse. One tiny, awkward pup hobbled behind. The boy's eyes lit up. "I want that one," he exclaimed, pointing to the runt. The man shook his head solemnly. "Son, that puppy will never be able to run and play like the others."

The boy rolled up his trousers to reveal a steel brace running down both sides of one leg. "I do want that puppy. I don't run too well myself, and he'll need someone who understands him."

That day the boy won the puppy because he moved the farmer's heart. Why? Because empathy impacts people. Researchers define empathy as the ability to sense other people's emotions and to imagine how they might be thinking or feeling. Empathy is essential to human interactions because it allows us to connect in authentic ways and to offer helpful words, comfort, or assistance. Empathy is essential in every human interaction but is especially significant for those in customer service.

Empathy Begins with Real Listening

Would you like to be more successful in minimizing difficult situations or by helping customers overcome their hesitations as you're trying to make a sale?

All empathy begins with real listening. As you listen with empathy, ask questions like:

• "How is this situation affecting you?"
  
• "Can you tell me more about _____?"
  
• "What do you think would be your ideal outcome here?"
  

As a person processes, take care not to interrupt. While you may not be equipped to address their concerns, asking empathetic questions can shift your focus to listen more effectively, opening new lines of communication and diffusing tension so everyone can move forward.

Empathy involves reflective listening, using phrases that demonstrate your understanding. Phrases that show customers you are taking customers seriously might include:

• "I can understand how frustrating it is when . . ."
  
• "I see this is very complicated/upsetting."
  
• "I'm sorry to hear that and I'll do my best to help."
  

Pair Compassion with Action

As you communicate compassion, be ready to follow your words with action.

Take ownership of a situation by following up immediately, by referring it to a superior, or by positively addressing both the person and the problem. Phrases like, "ok, we can fix this," or "let's get this sorted out right away," will reassure customers you're taking ownership of the problem.

Action-based empathy also means thinking outside the box for large-scale change. Erin Henkel, portfolio director at the IDEO global design and innovation company, says often positive innovation begins with empathy:

"Effective companies need employees who constantly imagine themselves in the customer's shoes. As they make the customer's problems their own, they are better able to meet expectations, make necessary changes, and to retain customer loyalty for another day."

Being able to put yourself in someone else's shoes is a hallmark of intelligent leadership and of excellent teamwork. Work hard to grow empathy and you will open new lines of communication, create greater understanding, and help everyone achieve common goals.